“Kissing
the Ring” – Reverence, Bureaucracy and the Rights of Children.
Mr
Fergus Finlay, Chief Executive at Barnardos Children’s Charity talks candidly
about ‘disability’ ‘children’s rights’ and ‘redefining the family’
The man behind Barnardos, the grey suit, and the beard, who is he?
The child who is taken into care because their parents are proven to be unfit
to care for them, who is this child? The person who is discriminated for having
a disability, who are they?
All of these questions deserve an answer, but sometimes when trying
to describe a person or situation certain aspects need a little more time and
perhaps as some would say a re-evaluation.
The man behind Barnardos
children’s charity is Mr Fergus Finlay Chief Executive, the child taken into
care and the person discriminated against because of a disability; are the
people Mr Finlay fights for.
“A reluctant disability activist for over 40 years” says Mr Finlay
but not for reasons one would think instead because “My Mrs and I had a
daughter Mandy, born with Down syndrome” and from that moment disability enter
your house, you have to fight to not let your house be turned into a second
class citizen household. The fight against prejudice begins.
Speaking openly and honestly the man behind the grey suit and the
beard is very much a family man. Opening up to his own personal family history
with disability was a touching sentiment to the work he does with other
families. The reasons why the Chief Executive of Barnardos has been a reluctant
activist is that it is his strongest belief that “We are always happy to put
money in a tin but not to fight for basic rights”
A campaigner, a father and now a grandfather, Mr Finlay talked of
“The most shaming thing he has ever done” and this shaming act I hear you ask,
what is it? It is an aspect of parenthood that challenges the majority of
parents in Ireland and this is the age old question, Should you smack your
child?
A believer in honesty, Mr Finlay owned up to his own misgivings for
having once smacking one of his children. What captivated me was that he asked
his child to forgive him years later. This gives great faith in the character
of Mr Finlay and an air of honestly that many parents would now be scared or
afraid to admitting smacking their child.
Witty humour and a genuine presence of integrity filled the room;
Mr Finlay discussed The Lafoy report, institutional abuse, and Baltimore. This
raised the greatest question from this talk, and this is a fact that has been reitered
again and again. What is it? It is the reverence that Catholic Ireland created
for itself, until children, now adults began to tell of their abuse.
“Children were sent to these institutions by judges in a court who
signed the order to take them away from their parents” says Fergus Finlay. The
reason that the Children’s Referendum will take place in Ireland on November 10th
is because; abuse victims from institutions such as Baltimore had no
representation. Instead they were sent to a childhood of abuse, a stolen
childhood.
Reverence for the laity, was the moral grounding for Catholic
Ireland but what did this reverence teach us. It thought us that the children
of Ireland who were abused and had their childhoods stolen were betrayed,
betrayed by the system, betrayed by those in power.
The referendum which takes place in Ireland next month has five
main purposes. They include aspects of childhood that for years have been
ignored in Ireland. They include the voice, protection, best interest, and
equality and adoption legislation regarding the child.
“Putting our kids at the heart of the constitution” says Fergus
Finlay is what will prevent the mistakes that happened a previous generation of
Irish children.
The notion of “kissing the ring” is what led me to question the
Barnardos Executive on comments made on the family and the fact that two
parents are proven to be better than one. Catholic Ireland condoned
homosexuality and the notion of gay parenting was unheard of. The question
raised was whether gay parenting should come to the forum now too, because just
as people with disability were treated as second class citizens so too were the
homosexual population of Ireland.
This referendum is about the rights and best interests of children,
and it is my strong belief that children in care would be better would be
better off in a loving environment, whether this be a heterosexual or
homosexual family. Children are now going to have the right to a choice, a
choice which should include having same sex parents.
We are no longer the Ireland that has to bow to the constraints of
the powers of the Catholic Church. They had their chance and they messed it up.
November 10th 2012 will see
the redefining of the rights and best interests of Irish children, but what we
were led to believe by the Catholic Church was right, was so gravely wrong.
Generations of Irish citizens “kissed the ring” of the Catholic Church and what
was happening behind closed doors, vast amounts of neglect, torture, and
emotional pain.
The man behind one of Ireland’s leading charities is the person
that Ireland should be lining up to “kiss the ring” just as the structure of
the family will be redefined on November 10th by giving the power
back to our children. My faith in a new age reverence grew intensely today
sitting in the presence of Fergus Finlay.
A Family man, a worldly man, it makes for a happy thought to
realize that there are good people still in our world that care what happens to
the most vulnerable in society.
“I’m not against the naughty step” says Fergus Finlay; the witty
chuckle is the vision of a man who cares. He represents everything we should
believe in, he will redefine the mistakes of a previous generation.
This is why
all need to vote YES on November 10th 2012. It’s time to redefine
the past.
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